Ep 108: A Full Accounting of the Soul

A few days into the new Jewish year, we connect to reflect on what we learned in our Elul offerings, and to offer some lessons about the practice of cheshbon hanefesh, or accounting of the soul. Taking cues from the English word accounting, we play with what it means to have an accurate assessment of our liabilities and our strengths. How can we counter the social conditioning that discourages celebrating progress (and why is it important?)? 

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Reflect with our Elul 5782 prompts:
https://joyousjustice.com/elul


Discussion and reflection questions:

1. What in this episode is new for you? What have you learned and how does it land?
2. What is resonating? What is sticking with you and why?
3. What feels hard? What is challenging or on the edge for you?
4. What feelings and sensations are arising and where in your body do you feel them?

Transcript

Tracie: 0:00

In the midst of the days of all we look back at the lessons learned in the last year, and take a closer look at hash bone nephesh or accounting of the soul.

April Baskin: 0:13

This is Jews talk racial justice with April and Tracy,

Tracie: 0:16

a weekly show hosted by April Baskin and Tracie Guy Decker.

April Baskin: 0:20

in a complex world change takes courage,

Tracie: 0:23

wholehearted relationships can keep us accountable.

April Baskin: 0:26

And happy 5783 Tracie?

Tracie: 0:29

Yeah, You too, April.

April Baskin: 0:31

As I just said, when we first started our call before we started recording, it's nice to see you on the other side of the new year and nice to be here on the other side of the new year, on the other side of this new year with you friend. I'm feeling for me anyway, this Jewish new year has been very much welcomed. And I rarely feel that way. And I'm really grateful for all the different lessons that 5782 had, for me a number of which I asked for, but who seems to be a theme in my life, they were not for the faint of heart. And I think maybe it's true of other folks in general and just certain people may be more or less ready to really face them. And I was more ready but still had to struggle with it. What was very aware and I think for other people, it's, they're going through similar things but because either for different reasons, either they don't have the education or support or whatever they might be like, numbing out or, or just like not going straight into the, into the stretch. Like, you know, for me, I was like I could do shadow comforts or other things and ignore these growing pains that are surfacing. But it was clear to me like the only way out was through and I'm appreciating the second day of the new year because it genuinely feels like I want to say fruitful as generative is also not the right word as productive know, what's the right word for Shmita year as transformative or as wisdom producing. Facilitating as the Shmita year was for me I'm just happy to be here and the that's the marking of the New Year gives me an energy boost of like yes, this does feel new and we have new things happening. We've been doing new things but also having something external and profound also saying that to like a new sheet has you know, like we're into a new chapter we're on a new page

Unknown: 3:02

I'm happy to have

April Baskin: 3:04

somewhat of a clean slate How are you coming? How are you coming into this listener? Like how are you feeling coming into 5782 is 8383 Is anything I'm saying resonating? I bet you like I'm also curious to hear how Tracie is feeling on the other side

Unknown: 3:26

of this Jewish year divide things

Tracie: 3:29

April Yeah, it's 5782 Definitely had a lot of lessons.

April Baskin: 3:40

that was perfectly said that, that that sigh That that's like the perfect

Tracie: 3:48

I'm just thinking about all the things that like never could have predicted as I entered 5782 You know, like when we recorded last year and I talked about like less efforting and the Shmita year and trying to just rest and see what fallow you know what fallow looks like? And when I sat in this exact chair and said, You know, I'm just curious to see and feel what fallow looks like I had no idea what was in store for me. Which, which I guess makes sense, right? None of us can none of us can see the future. Yeah. So, yeah, yeah. And, you know, this time these days of awe, you know, such a contemplative time. Thank you. I mean, we make it so and, you know, I remembering when I was in undergrad,

Unknown: 4:57

I was uh, I don't

Tracie: 4:59

remember or what year somewhere in the middle, a sophomore, junior. And I was taking this course I was religion major. And I was taking this course on Islam. And I was we were assigned to like write a book on a surah, which is a chapter of the Quran. And so I'd read it, obviously only in English that don't worry Arabic. And it was like really confusing. To me at the time, it was all Moses was traveling with Joshua, and they had their lunch in a basket. And then they come to the meeting of the two seas and like their lunch, which was like a fish came back to life. And I was just like, a little bit dumbfounded. And then, like, I kept like cogitating on it, and I was like, Oh, the two seas are like the two worlds. And I went and told my professor, I was like, Well, I think the two seas are the two worlds. And I was really, really proud of myself. And my professor was like, you know, the time between Rosh Hashanah and Yom was like a really special time. And so that was probably like, helped you come to that insight. That's a great insight, but, and I was a little put out by that answer, like, like, I felt like he was suggesting that it wasn't my, you know, brilliant.

April Baskin: 6:09

That was interpreting

Tracie: 6:10

this text, but rather, you know, some some external special thing. Yeah, well, thank you for the for the masa. But actually, I'm looking back on this now. 20, some years later, and I have such a different perspective on it, you know, like it. At the time, it felt like an insult. Like he didn't think that I was capable. Without external,

April Baskin: 6:36

definitely went out of sales.

Tracie: 6:42

And but now, it's sort of like, oh, it's that time, like, what

Unknown: 6:49

inside insight that was out of reach before

Tracie: 6:52

will now be within reach, because I am in proximity to where this who sees me, you know, like, it just it feels different, even with the content of that particular Surah that I was studying those 20 years ago, I, I feel like I'm now he's 20 years later, or maybe a little bit more ready for the insight that he was trying to share with me after I shared my insight about the Surah, I had no intention of going, that was like a way

April Baskin: 7:23

round, I love it. And it actually actually brings up something that I wasn't planning to talk about. And I'm still not fully prepared for it. But I'm just going to go for it. Anyway, I want to lean more, we're both you've been sort of the champion of talking about this. And as we talked about, it looks differently for both of us similarly and differently. But I want to lean more into imperfection. And I've been working on this while I was doing my tic toc page to have just like, but I love what you're saying. And it reminded me of something that that Rabbi Gil hammer said yesterday during the services, and there were multiple things happening within me in the service, different posts coming through in the chat with like the prayers and songs. And I think that was around the time after I'd shared some beautiful prose that a friend of mine recently wrote, and I asked her if I could share them during the Rashanna, the coconut Rashanna service and she gave me permission. And I was doing some follow up with people in the chat who were like, that was amazing and made me cry. Can you share that? Like, where can I find this poem. And it was very poetic. And I actually broke it down like a poem that from my reading of it, but it was just like a paragraph. It's like, I think she just thought it was like something she wrote pre Rashanna. And it was gorgeous. And so it was also doing a little bit of fun. I was a little distracted. But I find during these services often like one it's kind of like when you're in a really juicy conversation or something. And different people say things during the service that really stir you and then like I can kind of you know me, I can go a little bit like go off into that world. I'm like, wait, that was something else really brilliant. But I missed the context. It was what it was one of those kinds of moments. And she said, and I'm gonna kind of backfill what the that often Rashanna is described as the birthday of the world. But she said that in our literature, and this is the part where I miss the exact thing. This is what I would guess but I don't remember this is what she said it was recorded. So I have to go back and listen to the recording to confirm that the translation of the actual Hebrew word that's used that is often translated as birthday, which is such a coherent feminist thing is actually means conception. That this is the day that the world was conceived. And I just think that that's really juicy in a lot of ways. I think it it speaks to the power of some of what we're talking about. In the self coaching framework we've taught and grounded and growing And then in terms of being between two worlds and something coming into being I also just like from a generative evolutionary perspective, it, I just I just really love processes. And as someone who spent a lot of time building different departments and launching different initiatives and all of the generative work we do together as a team with injurious justice and creating different initiatives. Conception is a very different stage than birth and launching and, and so I just, it seemed a little bit aligned. And and I like the idea or the thought, even if it's not widely known, that that part of what we are celebrating on Rosh Hashanah in as it aligns with how much I am into and love and thinks that a core part of a just future that we are moving toward is radical imagination. Are is watering the seeds that haven't yet bloomed of, of what we want. I just I really love that reframe of thinking about

Unknown: 11:15

I've just what that

April Baskin: 11:17

allows for or encourages just just a simple reframe that Rosh Hashanah

Unknown: 11:23

is the day that

April Baskin: 11:27

the world was conceived. And then there's also like a whole side thing, which we don't need to get into, or we can a little bit and just be indulgent about

Unknown: 11:36

I think we both are still pretty clear that

April Baskin: 11:41

abortion makes sense when it is necessary. That whole thread. But that's but in terms of ideas. For us as people, but just to just to just a lot of different things. We don't have to get into all of them. But I just think that that is really ripe. And like just a juicy, rich space to think about all kinds of things like the ways in which once something is conceived, what protection does it need and that it's real. It's not it's not it hasn't fully come into what it will be it is not a human, but it is the beginnings of whatever that thing will be. And that it is it is sacred and worthy of care and mindful treatment. And,

Tracie: 12:36

and what it's what it receives during that gestation period actually also helps determine how healthy it will be once it fully managed. Which I think is really a powerful like, a metaphor, right?

April Baskin: 12:51

Yes, that's a perfect that there's so many that one could do. And that is a really amazing one. Because exactly, because so many people think, oh, it's not that thing yet, but it actually watering the seeds, which is as you know, something I love to say in the context of our programs. We haven't talked about it so so much, but I want to talk about it. More that yeah, it's just a little bit. But if you want it to become a mighty oak at some point, it's just going to start out as a sprout. And there's got to be a way for us to hold the vision of where it's going of the world that will become and also it's going to be on a journey there and we can keep watering it and protecting it until it comes fully into fruition. Yeah. So another reason why I'm feeling sweet about

Unknown: 13:40

this new year is we had a few

April Baskin: 13:45

we had four really well

Tracie: 13:48

we we had a busy week last week. We really did

April Baskin: 13:51

and I saw coming but then because I I've engaged in the sands fam intense family ritual the week before I was I didn't have full perspective because being just being home and in my familiar environment was not as intense as this intensive. But it was an I I was out on my bed most of the

Tracie: 14:11

weekend. It was a lot it was a lot. I make I use the color yellow, like a like a mustardy Goldenrod color for like when we facilitate for those blocks on the calendar. Like it was like the whole week was just Yeah.

April Baskin: 14:26

My whole week was green. Right and every end the nice thing about it was Tracy which was a really sweet way to end the year and a really good transition into this year is every call was wonderful. It took a lot so we're not I don't think we're looking to make a habit of facilitating that many conversate fresh conversations in a week but the coaching that happened in that space and that earnest and sincere can commitment and curiosity and morality, open heartedness exactly if there was just going to get an open heartedness vulnerability that people brought on to the calls. And us meeting it with compassion and strength, and clarity. Like it just, it was really wonderful. We had our hour shift call on Sunday, and then to have our a little, little a little conversations on the on Tuesday and Thursday, and in the middle, sandwiched between you had the CEU, the closing class for our second cohort of grounded and grow, it was just it was a

Tracie: 15:43

lot, a lot. It was a lot, it was

Unknown: 15:46

a lot, and

April Baskin: 15:49

but it was fun, it affirmed for me, how much not that I needed it, but it's still good, you know, the more information the better, how much I love working with you.

Unknown: 16:03

And Sarah, too.

April Baskin: 16:08

We wanted to share some of the a couple of the insights that came out from our little conversation process, when it was sweet as we shared to do it. Thank you to everyone who gave donations. Some folks came to the local calls, others didn't and just donated. Also, I don't know if we have a task there potentially, of if we need to send out recordings, which might still be nice to do during the days of ha ha but I think some folks like it was just I felt really well thought of by people in our community. And it was just, I can't quite put it into words. And some of it I think might be just entered an energetic for me an energetic reading. But I felt as I was seeing some of the notifications, it felt it felt like love. Yeah, yeah, whether it was $18 or 162. The, you know, at times when we receive things that feels like, like, obviously, they're great, but it really felt like the sense that I had is that folks read our email, and either wanted to come and or looked at the schedule knew they couldn't and just, I just really feel like they were like, I want them to know that I see them. And I appreciate them and this event, and I want to give and so I just want to if you were one of those folks who did that, I want to say a few thank yous and one of them is a thank you to you especially we have our email replies that we sent to folks. But I also just wanted to say how much we appreciate that support. And thank you very much. And then we had a number of people on each of the calls. And as you know, Tracy, I don't think I've shared this publicly. I really like at times when we repeat a process and give a couple of like we did that this this round with grounded and growing where we offer two class times. And as a facilitator and teacher, I love teaching the same material twice to different audiences, because I find that the conversations are similar in some ways, but also really take on a life of their own. And as someone and I think this goes for you to Tracy, who, who really loves and appreciates this material, it's really interesting to see how it comes to life in different ways. And so I also just want to share and that was because of the wonderful, open hearted courageous souls and committed souls who joined us on these calls and contributed to making them very special for all of the attendees. And also for us, we did this as a thank you and a gift. And as often said, it ended up feeling very much like a gift for me and for our team. And for you, Tracy and that was not why I went into it. I really just wanted to express love and hold space for our people. And it was really sweet to be received in that for people to show up with an aligned energy around that and it ended up nourishing my heart in an anticipated and unanticipated ways.

Tracie: 19:26

Yeah, before the event we asked some we invited folks to spend some time reflecting on some prompts that we shared, I was just going to briefly share some of those prompts to help kind of frame. So we asked you in light of all that's changed and also what hasn't. How have you shifted? What are one or two ways that you have or are changed or changing and how do you feel about that change? We asked what has you feeling stuck or said Other way what challenges take up more brain space than you'd like? First thought best thought there are no wrong answers.

Unknown: 20:07

And then we asked.

Tracie: 20:10

We, we noted that we believe in the power of appreciative inquiry and asked what something that you do think or feel that you want more of. So those were the key questions that we asked folks to reflect on as a, as a a rule Heshbon nephesh accounting of the soul kind of a exercise that elicited as you noted, to the participants, like not as clear consensus, as other times, you've done qualitative analysis like this. And also, I feel like there were a few kind of patterns

April Baskin: 20:46

and themes that arose that were not universal. They weren't it wasn't laid out, I wrote my thesis about Jews of color where there weren't many things. But every single person, like, you know, like 98% of the participants said, some variation of I'd like to hear the stories of other Jews of color, I'd like to connect with others, there was like that there were some threads that were near unanimous amidst a wide range of things. There were some core anchors that nearly everyone, in a few cases had similar. Unfortunately, nearly every person had a range of they everyone had positive experiences. But everyone had consistently across an alarming range of negative experiences that they've had. Whereas in this case, it was all it was relatively all over the map. But even within that, there were some patterns and clusters of dynamic relations of it. Yeah. And I also wanted to add logistically, before we dive into that, Tracy that I think we did it in our last episode, and we'll do it in this episode. If you hear these questions, and they feel generative to you, we aren't having another a little conversation. But if you'd like to see the questions, we can include the link to the Google Form that we use for these. In Lulu now Tishrei reflections, I think that they can still be helpful during these days of Aw, if you hear these and you're like, ah, you know, I kind of missed this before. But I would like to reflect on these questions. If you want to submit them, you can do it anonymously. And or you can include your email and have it sent to you either way is fine. Most of the people who fill that out for us, which we noted in our which I noted, and we noted in our reflections, more than half of the people didn't include their email addresses, which I mostly thought of as a positive thing that people really heard our invitation to share open heartedly and preferred to keep their identity strictly anonymous, which is part of what we were offering in the container. And so I'm glad that folks, despite having some things that felt private and sensitive that they were willing to still trust us to share them. And if that's helpful for you, we'll include the link to all of the available information if so that if you want to make a donation and or want to review these different questions and access them, either fill out the form or just use it as a launching pad to engage in some of your own reflection during this time. That is an option. So now that I said touch base about that logistical piece, Tracy, you're moving us into some of the core bits that we were really excited to talk about about some of the patterns that we saw.

Tracie: 23:29

I don't think that we should rehash what we did in the actual a little conversations. But I thought I might just like sort of top line. And then

April Baskin: 23:39

yes, I think kind of giving a little bit of an overview because it was, yeah, it just matches and aligns with the theme that people were being very thoughtful. And so I think it's great that a number of the themes that came through all had the theme of people really, genuinely diving deep. And

Tracie: 23:58

so some of the trends that we saw in the answers, even though they were not universal, as you say, some of the interesting trends were that I was, there were a number of people who either said they were feeling more grounded now, or we're seeking out mechanisms to help them feel more grounded, which makes total sense in both actually. Because another one of the trends was several people talked about how they're much more comfortable with being alone. They're much more comfortable with solitude now than they used to be, which also makes sense given that, as I said, the way that I phrased it in our call that we're now in the third season of our dystopian Apocalypse TV show that we're all living in. And the apocalypse for us has been that we have to be afraid of being in proximity to others. And so becoming more comfortable with solitude makes total sense as we're learning to live with The effects of the global pandemic. And the inverse was also true, though. Right, which we noted that, everyone, not everyone, many people expressed desire the thing they want more of in 6783 is community and connection. I was really struck APR by the way that folks described the connection they were looking for. They wanted more one to one connection. They wanted more visioning in hovered or in, you know, sacred partnership. They wanted real connection. Transformative. Yeah. And like that.

Unknown: 25:42

And to me, that

April Baskin: 25:43

isn't perfect. And to me, that's a, that actually makes a lot of sense. Because if one is more comfortable with their own company, you want some you genuinely want something that's higher quality, you want connection, but it's not necessarily filling a similar void that now is filled by. And we might be like extrapolating a bit, but I think some of these core principles apply with when you're when you actually enjoy your own company. It's not that we don't need company anymore, but our desire for the quality can can rise.

Tracie: 26:15

Right, right. Like we don't just want to be entertained to feel space or past. Yeah, right. Right. Exactly. And I was really, really struck by that and deeply resonated as I was reading, and then and it also deeply resonated with our participants, right, because we invited them to share with us as things kind of rang, rang true or, or resonated one way or another with them. And that was the that was the outcome that generated the most kind of, you know, heart reactions among our zoom participants,

April Baskin: 26:47

especially on the second call people. Every amenity really they were like, ooh, fat, really, like people were really saying with us and listening with different pieces. Participating a little bit, but when that theme came up, that crew was really like, yes, that is truth. Want to hear more about that? I wanted to discuss that. And we talked about it just briefly on the calls a little a little bit, and I invited you to share this insight that I'm very excited for us to, for you to share on the podcast Tracy. But there was also a, an interesting little thing that did come up pretty, pretty consistently, which is that in response to our third question, in which we asked people to take a moment to reflect and then share, what are positive things or what are things that they appreciate in their life, they would like to continue or they'd like more of in their year that people pretty consistently almost seemingly like misunderstood the question and chose to fool and or just out of habit energy, focused in on things that they want to change, or lack, and what they want to fill that lack? And it's very interesting, because I was asking that question, as a way to kind of generally positively contradict that natural human pattern that many people have. And, and particularly during a time during a season where themes of judgment and repentance, mind you through a Jewish lens, but in the context of, of our Jewish community, being immersed in the context of Christian hegemony, even though our theology is very different in a number of ways, there's still some of that fear that can that can kind of come into the experience. And I wanted us to ask a question. And we'd already asked people like, you know, what, what's it? We asked them in different way? But essentially, like, what's keeping them up at night type of question,

Tracie: 28:57

right? We didn't how they were stuck, we actually use the word stop, stop saying,

April Baskin: 29:02

right, yeah. And so we asked that we had touched upon that. And so in this question it this was our next steps. Question. And so I actually think it's really and I think that that's how I'm kind of remembering it. That's sort of my it was my intention, as we were crafting that question that like, what's like, you know, what are asking questions more about how reflecting back and thinking about present time and where do you want to where you struggling and also to thinking about next steps that are possible that we have to take? What can we be thinking about what for you personally to each person are things that were really helpful that you want to carry? And most folks with the exception of one person, so one person, I feel like maybe there was one other but like, one person wrote visioning and have Ruta. So there were a couple people who did say, this is something that I've really enjoyed, and that I would like more of most other folks Did it and focus on either in their lives or within themselves a sense of deficit and wanting to correct, which is really different than what we were asking. And so I think I want to just in a moment pretty quickly dive into your insight, Tracy, because it really, I loved it. And it landed well for our participants on both calls. But this is like a theme that I see coming up, there's a broader theme, and this is not as fun, so I don't want to focus on it. But this is a trend that I noticed that happens in our community. And it's helpful to see because I've been working on it in the context of justice, power and belonging, particularly as it relates to diversity, equity and inclusion in our community. And I'm just realizing now that it's helpful to see that it's not just that subject where this challenge that I see our community having, which I think he's also, again, also affects other people too. But I think that there are specific cultural and sociological elements, that this is live for our people often, that it's difficult at times for our people to move from strength to strength, to recognize and honor and celebrate progress or strengths, and weave that into and, and simultaneously say, and there are bits here, and bobs and different things that are either missing or problematic. And I want to take ownership of the strength and or the positive attributes in my experience, and use that to bully me in service of moving toward what I want, that this is something that I don't think everyone has to do it. But in my experience, as someone who has historically often lacked resources, this, this strategy has been vital, and has made the difference from my perspective of succeeding or not, or the level of struggle I have with making forward movement, despite the odds. And so to me, it's just a vital strategy that I see our community consistently struggling with, and you have a really, seasonally timely metaphor that I think is so helpful. And I'd love for you to share it with Tracy. Thanks, April.

Tracie: 32:16

Yeah, so this is the time when we're invited to do a fresh hash bone, her nephesh and accounting of the soul. And I think when we hear that, and the way that we practice, it usually is sort of, you know, a very

Unknown: 32:34

a critical eye.

Tracie: 32:36

What did I do wrong in the past year that I need to

April Baskin: 32:40

repair what needs fix or fix?

Tracie: 32:43

What do I What What harm did I do that I need to repair, which I think actually is an unimportant thing to do? And what do I need to fix? Especially about myself? How do I need to fix me in the coming

April Baskin: 32:56

year, and also and also, and a relation and also have certain things been done to me where I would like repair, to or to people's or communities, I'm a part of where I would like there to be some healing or repair around that, right. So both like looking at my own bit like there's the parts where we are invited to I'm just adding on that there's also the added layer of both specifically us doing self reflection, and then also engaging in that self reflection and noting, noticing the places where we've been hurt and perhaps where we might be longing to receive an apology or to have solutions that we talked about in the last episode. Right,

Tracie: 33:38

right. Right. The and the thing that I'm realizing this year, is I think about though, the way we translate fun and effort and I have to admit to you all that I did not go do any etymological research on hash bomb. So but in English, accounting, accounting is not only looking at deficit, it's not only looking at liabilities, if you're looking at an accounting ledger, it has both the assets and the liabilities, the credits and the debits. And if you only look at one side of the ledger, you do not have a complete picture of whatever organization or individual or account, you do not have a complete picture of the account. So you do not

Unknown: 34:28

say it Tracy.

Tracie: 34:30

And so I'm really thinking about that other side of the ledger, not just what I've done wrong, which I have to I do have to look at that side of the ledger, but also what I've done right that I want to keep doing, and that's an invitation that I think is more agitational for folks than I maybe anticipated it would be but I think that's a good thing. I think that means that's the medicine that is needed that And when it is a little agitational in that way and hearing

April Baskin: 35:02

it this like third or fourth time, because we talked about it before each of the classes, then we talked about it before the class has been talked about on the classes, part of what I love about this. So one, is this landing well with you, beloved listener, because it's just like, right, it's like, Ah, yes, right, we need to be balanced. And what I love about this is that I find, when we invite people to appreciate something themselves at the end of our classes, or when I'm talking about this with my clients, it's almost like in their minds, they are so accustomed to focusing on the negative that like when you what I love about what you shared is that it indicates balance, balance. And it's interesting to me that people have such strong habit energy around solely focusing on the liabilities, that when you ask them, not to write the scales, not to only focus on the positive, to focus on just something and or one thing or a milestone. So for instance, with when I was working with organizations around the racial justice journeys, we're still very much on the journey. These are like 20, year five to 20 year arcs. And I wanted folks

Unknown: 36:16

to just pause

April Baskin: 36:21

and celebrate some milestones, there was just this huge aversion to this. And so as you were saying this, I'm just getting even more passionate about this, because it occurs to me that the orientation that people have to it, which

Unknown: 36:37

just like there's a summary here

April Baskin: 36:39

that I'm that I'm on the edge of my tongue, but it's hard for me to do both at the same time. It's like, it's so unbalanced, that just the prospect of answering a single question that is in the direction of it, it's not even necessarily about you, it's just about something in your life, you know, so in some ways, a simple way of talking about it is this, this speaks to me in a way that I never thought of before, about the value of y. And you know, as you know, as the listeners may know, I really prefer the word appreciation or like this frame of like, what wonderful things happened. But it speaks to why gratitude is so helpful. And it's not just because appreciation or gratitude are great in and of themselves. In part, it's because

Unknown: 37:25

things in a number of

April Baskin: 37:27

ways are so out of balance, that just doing that practice, it is potent, in and of itself, just starts to help people overall without realizing it get to a more rational, balanced place of wholeness having a more holistic understanding of what is happening in their world. And for me, this is important, not just because it's nice, but because it's

Unknown: 37:53

pragmatic. Because when we

April Baskin: 37:57

are able to notice what our assets are, and leverage them and appreciate them, and savor them and feel emotions of gratitude around them, that is a completely different process than just being like, I need to scale this mountain with nothing alone. Like, it's helpful to notice I have strong legs, and I have good navigate like it's, it is helpful. It is helpful. So there's so there's a lot to say about this. And but I just I think what what I love about this example or metaphor that you brought is that it really concretizes it in a way and helps make very clear that just from a point of accuracy. You know, when you understand accounting, you need to be accounting for both of those pieces. But our conditioning has been so strong in a variety of different ways, in the context of oppression for both people who have been targeted, and also people who have also experienced dehumanization who are in the non target positions around the culture of perfectionism and production, and what is your inherent source of value? And often in our society, it's placed around work product. Yeah, well, and also I love that just it just it serves multiple serves as multiple forms of medicine and multiple different ways. But that communicates balance and the value and just the rationality.

Tracie: 39:28

I think that's exactly it. The rationality that you're pointing to is really like,

April Baskin: 39:31

key. Yeah, this is not fluff. This is well.

Tracie: 39:36

There's, there's such a stigma around like bragging that there's such a stigma around that, that we shouldn't like

April Baskin: 39:43

around many different britches or whatever. It isn't that fascinating, and that is so deeply in service of maintaining oppression and disempowerment for everyone.

Tracie: 39:55

So, but when you when you say I mean there, there is nothing more sort of Rational and emotionless than accounting, at least not in my mind. And so they're, you know, to put it in that in those terms, which, which is, you know, I didn't accounting of the soul is the way that the phrase is translated and so you if we're saying like, No, we're not we're taking the emotion out of it. It's not about it's not about humility at this point, right? Because even even our most our masters who teach us about anavah, about humility, it's humility is not complete self Abnegation. Right, you know, it's, it's, it's that midpoint between arrogance and self Abnegation, and so fine. And, and so that it just, it fits nicely. And I think you're pointing to the rationality is really significant and useful,

April Baskin: 40:52

it just makes it more clear, because what that example it's, it's, it's profoundly in alignment with what I'm asked asking people to do. But because of the cultural climate, the perception is so cute skewed that people get accounting. And people understand, as you just said that that has balance. And that is what I want for our people and for all people is to be able to see clearly. And to address the challenges that need to be addressed. And also notice what is going well, because often a number of those pieces in different ways, if for no other reason than just knowing it can give us more confidence. But at times, a number of those things can be deeply in service or can help us experience some additional ease or empowerment around facing what's difficult to face. And yeah, so I just am really excited about that we share this, I hope that it's helpful for you, beloved listener, and friend. And feel free to send us a message and all the different ways that you can if, in addition to what we've said, you also see, well, what about anything if you have any thoughts about anything we talked about in this episode, but also to specifically because I think this example that Tracy shared is helpful in so many ways. And so if you had an epiphany that aligns or doesn't fully align with some of the examples we gave, please feel free to share because I think that there are a lot of different, wonderful, helpful implications to this teaching. And I'd love to have more of them elevated. So I hope that this episode and other different bits and bobs and experiences in your life in the coming days, contribute to positive momentum, and self aware and balanced analysis as self and global analysis as we enter into 5783. And thank you for joining us for another episode. And as you know, a pivot in the podcast is coming precisely what it is I'm not sure we have a number of different pieces we need to figure out. But we are so grateful that you continue to join us on this journey and share episodes that resonate with friends. We've grown and part of that has to do with our ongoing marketing. And part of it has to do with the fact that you've also shared our episodes. So as I mentioned before, I'm just feeling really deep appreciation right now. For you and for Tracie and for Sarah and for a number of the partners with whom we have worked and continue to work or will work.

Unknown: 43:57

And I'm excited

April Baskin: 43:59

for what this year holds. Thanks for tuning in. Our show's theme music was composed by Elliot hammer. You can find this track and other beats on Instagram at Elliot hammer. If this episode resonated with you, please share it and subscribe. To join the conversation visit us jewstalkracialjustice.com where you can send us a question or suggestion, access our show notes and learn more about our team. Take care until next time and stay humble and keep going.